Yea its been a couple of days. Not too too much has happened. I've been in a bit of a bad mood, because a friend of mine owes me money, and i've been waiting like a week and a half now. / Grrrr. But i have been tlking to the person i like. Things seem to get better as the days progress. At this point im sure that she likes me lol yea took me this long to be sure about it . Yesterday we txt messaged each other all night .a lot of what i thought were sweet words, were said, but she thinks it was embarassing. lol, women. . . i wish i could type out everything we said to each other  but that might take a while lol . but one thing that will probably stick with me is when she said that she would come over to my place. Now i can see that she really is happy, shes becoming more laid back, worrying less about other things, she might actually want to be with me./smiles. And i know she so wants to kiss me, but i dont think i should put those txt messages on the internet.

And today i said to her , u know if someone were to ask me right now if i were happy i'd say no, but if i were with u and someone were to ask me the same question i'd say, "No im not happy, not yet, but im not unhappy about it" ...and after 10 minutes of explaining it to her she blushed, and i feel better already.

Today was good . I got to see her sitting outside in the front of the school with her friends. Sure i didn't get to hang out with her in the morning like i had hoped but whatever. I have the rest of the school year to try and get her to come to school really early, or come to my house after third period one day. I mean she likes to take things slow, she said it herself. Hmmm i dunno, i kinda don't believe her. I know that deep down theres a little bad ass just waiting to get out. She seems like a really cool person; funny, exciting, happy. And i want to be apart of that. I want to be what makes her happy. I don't know if you know the feeling, but knowing you make someone happy is one of the best feelings in the world. I hope she knows that she makes me happy."Parting is such sorrow." I've said that to her about 3 times already. Meant it every time. I promised never to lie, which to me i find to be a really big thing to promise.Cool thing is i feel as though she understands that im only human right, im only a guy, so sure i'll make a mistake here and there and she accepts that , she can forgive me. But i hope she does know that i would never do anything to hurt her intentionally.She better get to school at like 7:20 tomorrow i swear!!!!

HOLA EVERYBODY, ok so this isn't a poem but this has been bothering me today so yea just thought maybe just write about it get it off my mind , you know that old chestnut. So yea theres this girl i used to like and well she kinda liked me but she wouldn't go out with me./tear right ? but then after the summer we spend a bit more time together, and start doing what teenagers call today, dealing. Yea i liked her, up until a few days ago, i started hanging with one of her friends. And well i've always known her friend and we've hung out before but like i dunno something was different this time, i noticed her a lot more then i usually did.Now that day really threw me off balance. Has that ever happened to you, you start liking someone its kinda headed into the direction that you'll probably start dating and then BAM!! three other people appear in your life. Like what the hell right, problems of a 16 year old teenager , right ? But i've eliminated 2 of the mystery beauties and braught it down to just one, "the one".Shes pretty hot, especially on some days. . . Wow, beautiful as beautiful can be, almost flawless, almost.and i really do like her, but theres only one problem, she has a boyfriend. Just my luck. As im writing this my phone rings, i pick up and its my friend who is a drug dealer whos asking me if i have the money that i owe him for the twenty sack he spotted me on a few days ago. Dont worry i have his money, i was really going halves on it with a friend but she never gives me the money so i'll pay for her. Im just a good guy like that. So back to the girl problem. Im not sure, i've dropped three single women to land on one who isn't single. But still her words echo in the abyss that is my heart,"..god, you turn me on so much. You have a way bout you..",  "thank god for that day that I met you in music & computers ","I had a crush on you in grade 9 ". Even though grade 9 was two years ago, just those words inspire a whole new insight on my situation.i might just end up with the right girl, for once.

Puff Puff Toke

With a puff puff, toke...
This cigarette fills my lungs with hope,
to make everything in my life go better.
Ain't got no job, ain't makin no cheddar.
But this supports my life,
my life on the streets.
Taking in these acid sheets.
Cuz its rave in and rave out
this life makes me wanna shout,
out loud into the heavens.
Is there a god. . .
Please save me![loud]
Just give me a home.

[Chorus]x2
This is my story...
No honor , no glory...
Can't go without a drag...
of the marijuana sitten in my bag.

I still go home in the middle of the night.
And in the house i see no light.
Just sitten on the roof hoppen for some kinda sign.
Some other shit.
Just something divine.
The young man of only 16 years of age.
Moves out of his parents to write his own page.
He left without knowing,
that living on his own would show him.
That the realworld is a terrible place.
Regrets a bitch, he had to learn in the hardest way.

[Chorus]x2

How did it all come to this,this downward spiral, it started oh so bliss.
A little experiment in the back of an alley.
Telling little white lies to the family. [pause]
With a puff puff, toke.
This cigarette fills my lungs with hope.
And now im laying in my bed at home.
Strong enough to show em.
That i can make it on my own.i can make it on my own.
This all started with a...[pause]
Puff puff toke.[loud]

Ha! ha!